1991 – Long-Lasting Friendships In The Making

Friendships can be amazing, and here’s why. So last week I met up with a friend I had not seen since 1991! A friendship I at that time had no idea would last this long.

You see, we went to grade school together. My friend Anu, moved away at the end of 4th grade.

We had been in the same class from the second grade and became friends. When his family moved away, I never really thought about not ever seeing him again, or if we would have a friendship.

Years passed by and we didn’t se or hear from each other.

Thanks to Facebook, we were able to reconnect and build on our friendship. He lives in London and I live in Vienna. it seemed like every time we planned to find a way to meet, it would not work out. UNTIL NOW!

You can imagine my excitement when he finally bought his ticket and was heading to Vienna. 

To cut a long story short, we had a fun reunion with lots of food, drinks and most importantly laughter.

It is funny how you can reconnect with someone after 25 YEARS! and feel like you only saw the person yesterday. 

 

friendships in the making

 

Friendship is defined as a relationship of mutual affection between people. A stronger form of interpersonal bond than an association.

The value of friendship is something that few people really appreciate.

Most often time, it is that moment when you need a friend or someone to talk to that you know you can trust, that you realize just how important it is to have a strong relationship to another person.

We do not always have the time to get together with friends, but with technology these days, you can usually get a hold of them by phone, email or text and social media.

I prefer face to face conversations, however, we cannot always fit them into our schedule. Good conversation usually equals a great friendship.

 

Why Is It Great To Have Friendships?

Simple. Good friends are good for your health, both in good and bad times.
Friends can help to:

– improve your self-confidence and self-worth

– increase your sense of belonging and purpose

– reduce your stress

– help boost your happiness

– reduce your stress

– support you and help you cope during tough times

– encourage you

– inspire and motivate you

 

friendships

 What Is A Healthy Number Of Friends?

Quality not quantity. Took me a while growing up to figure this one out!

It is excellent to have a diverse network of friends and acquaintances, especially for someone like me who travels a lot.

It is more important, though, to nurture a few close friends who will be there for you.
Do away with fair-weather friends. Those the types who are only a friend when circumstances are pleasant or profitable.

 Types of Friendships

 1. Friendships of Value

This is the type of friends where you value one another as people. You spend time together and one another’s company. There are no hidden agendas, and there is mutual trust and respect.
I love chatting with good friends for hours on the phone, or meeting for lunch or drinks and having a great laugh! It does wonders to my soul!

This is the highest form of friendship.

 

 2. Friendships of Mutual Interest

These kinds of friendships are usually based on a hobby or common interest. Dancing, yoga, sports, baby groups, art and so on. That is where your friendship is rooted.

Most times when one person loses interest in the hobby, the friendship ends.

 

 3. Friendships of Use

We all have one or two “friends” we never hear from except when they need something.
Once or twice a year, you get an email or text message from them asking how you are, or if you would like to meet for lunch or a drink.

In the back of your mind, you know they want or need something. an email That’s about as deep as the friendship goes. I sometimes find these requests irritating. It is so obvious why they are contacting you and you wonder if they have no shame!

At the same time, you must ask yourself why you are keeping this person in your life.

'True friends hear you even when you are silent.'' quote=''True friends hear you even when you are silent.''Click To Tweet

 Characteristics Of A True Friend

A true friend is not just sympathetic, they are empathetic. They share your feelings and are happy when you are happy, or sad when you are down.

A true friend will still love and respect you when you disagree.

Friendship is not about having the same opinions on all topics.

Have you had friendships tested when there is a disagreement? How did it end?

A good friend will give you advice and tell you what you need to hear (even though you may not like it).

True and close friends nurture friendships and communicate with you regularly. They are interested in what is going on in your life.

A true friend has earned your trust, just as you have earned theirs. You are able to confide in them about private and confidential matters in your life and do not ever have to worry about them sharing your information with another person.

 

 friendships nurtured

 Nurture Your Friendships

Nurturing friendships is a way to make sure that it continues to grow and become stronger.

Here are a few ways you can nurture your friendships:
– Listen
– Be Open
– Show Vulnerability
– Be kind
– Trust and show you can be trusted
– Be available
– Show empathy

Friendships will change and that is nothing to be afraid of. See it as a good and positive thing. This change is because people grow and it does not mean the friendship needs to end.

Boning with like-minded people are essential because they reflect back to us the ideals that are most important to us.
The oldest friendship I have is 26 years old. How about you?

Think about the friendships in your life. Is your support system a good, positive, motivational one? Or do you have friends in your life who undermine you?
After reading this, reflect and think about whether you are a good friend.

Share your thoughts on friendships with me in the comment section below.

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All Your Thoughts Are Welcome ~ Join The Conversation

36 thoughts on “Monday Musings: How Friendships Make You More Valuable

  1. Hi Sheri, It was inspiring to read through this post. I couldn’t agree more with what you said about friendship. A loyal friend is irreplaceable and the most precious thing you can have in life. I have a friend I’ve known since high school, we now moved away from each other, but we still talk every day, and never lost the contact. It’s amazing what technology can do nowadays and also means that a friend is a friend no matter the distance.

    Posted on November 20, 2016 at 08:34
  2. Friendship is built around trust. One of the best support system. You get to tell friends your rants and raves in life. Well, you really need to know who you hang around with. You don’t want to fall into a trap.

    Posted on November 19, 2016 at 23:31
  3. Eventually, I grew to learn the difference between Friendships of Value vs Friendships of Use. It was painful, but the growth is appreciative. I thank God for my loyal and committed friends daily.

    Posted on November 14, 2016 at 11:40
  4. To me loyalty is the number one attribute anyone can have. Especially friends.

    Posted on November 13, 2016 at 08:57
  5. When it comes to friendship, words could never be enough to explain the beauty of a true friend who stays with you, who stands for you when the rest of the world doesn’t. It is amazing when you get connected with a old friend with the help of Social Media and my oldest friendship is almost 30-years!!

    Posted on November 12, 2016 at 20:44
    1. You are so right Lisa. It is in those times you find out who is with you and who isn’t. Friendships that re real and true seem to be rare these days.

      Posted on November 13, 2016 at 04:33
  6. What a lovely article. I’m glad that you were able to reconnect with your friend after 25 years. It’s so true that friendships – at least the genuine ones- can help us to cope with just about anything. Thanks for sharing this.

    Posted on November 12, 2016 at 06:17
  7. Friendships are amazing. I just got in touch with my best friend this year. We stopped talking for about 3 years and then I just decided to email her and talk to her. I missed my best friend and I wanted her back in my life.

    Posted on November 11, 2016 at 14:51
  8. I have been a big believer in having a few TRUE friends who can help me grow and develop and I do the same for them than to have fake friends. I know which relationships are healthy for mine and there wellbeing and which are not

    Posted on November 11, 2016 at 04:39
  9. I value true friendships and even though my friends live in different parts of the world, we reconnect every so often so the bond is always there. Loving your article. Wish you’d share a picture of you and your friend.

    Posted on November 11, 2016 at 04:23
    1. You are right I should add a pic of us. I thought about it, then changed my mind! So shy!!! Grrrrrr. 🙂

      Posted on November 11, 2016 at 13:09
  10. Amen. Friendships are needed all around. Men, women and children. It makes live better.

    Posted on November 10, 2016 at 14:07
  11. Friendship is a beautiful thing! Thank you for sharing!

    Posted on November 10, 2016 at 12:49
  12. Friendship is the most beautiful selfless bond in this world. Glad that you got a chance to meet your old school friend after 25 years and had fun! Thanks to the Facebook, we can connect with our old friends!

    Posted on November 9, 2016 at 23:27
  13. I only have few close friends right now which I am very happy. We are all reliable to each other. It is so easy to talk to them. They tell me right away how they feel about my problem. They are not shy to tell me if I am being negative so I love them for their honesty.

    Posted on November 9, 2016 at 20:46
  14. What a lovely post and so true! I definitely believe good friendships reduces stress in your life and yes to quality very quantity! Ree love30

    Posted on November 9, 2016 at 16:51
  15. One of the greatest things about Facebook is how people have been able to not only re-connect but to sincerely develop and maintain friendships. I’m always so amazed at how I meet someone after so many years and it was like we had seen each other just the week before.

    Posted on November 9, 2016 at 15:51
  16. You know your true friends because no matter the length of time between talks…you pick right back up. I am lucky to have a few of those 🙂

    Posted on November 9, 2016 at 15:46
  17. I’ve always been one to only have a few close friends then lots of acquaintances. I agree nurturing these relationships is so impportant for happiness!

    Posted on November 9, 2016 at 14:44
  18. I have some really good friends and our friendsships go back to 15/20 years. We may not talk everyday, but whenever we do, its like, we never lost the touch. I always think, people who have true friends in their lives are truly lucky.

    Posted on November 9, 2016 at 14:06
  19. I once heard a saying (I suppose that’s what you can call it). If you can count your true friends on one hand, you know you have a good life. Friendship is a priceless thing and I do think that it is something to be valued.

    Posted on November 9, 2016 at 13:15
  20. Wow! I’ve been friends with my best friends since the 4th grade!! How cool!

    Posted on November 9, 2016 at 13:12
  21. I´m totally agreed with you, how important is the friendship and is not about quantity but is more quality. Specially also people like me who moved a lots in my life from country to another country. But how lucky we´re that we can stay connected with our friends via social media.

    Kintan xo,

    Posted on November 9, 2016 at 12:55
  22. Friendships are SO important. My best friend and I have known each other since we were 3 years old and I don’t know what I’d do without her. I am slow to grow fond of people and to open up so friendships to me are definitely quality over quantity 🙂
    Katja xxx

    Posted on November 9, 2016 at 11:31
  23. I’m 39 and am still close with friends I made as a toddler. I’m also glad for social media for making it easier to keep in touch with all the people I’ve met throughout the years.

    Posted on November 9, 2016 at 10:12
  24. Friendships are important. I’m glad I have some. My husband is in the military so we move every few years so sometimes it’s tough to make friends. I’m thankful for Facebook at least.

    Posted on November 9, 2016 at 08:21
  25. Quality definitely goes over the quantity!
    Friendships are so important, I don’t know where I would be if I had no friends at all.

    Posted on November 9, 2016 at 07:58
  26. I have learnt over the years that it is all about quality not quantity I met my closest friends at university and we always meet up anytime we can!

    Posted on November 9, 2016 at 07:57
  27. Beautiful. It was nice to read this this early morning. Some days you need to lean on people, and friends are sometimes the only ones even over family and spouses.

    Posted on November 9, 2016 at 06:38
  28. True friendship means everything 🙂 Such a great post – thanks for sharing! xx

    Posted on November 9, 2016 at 06:37
  29. Really good friends are the family we get to choose and we must treasure them.

    Posted on November 9, 2016 at 06:24
  30. Yes friendship is so important! I am so happy with the friends in my life! xo Sabine

    Posted on November 9, 2016 at 05:57
  31. Friendships really are amazing things, as long as they are healthy. It’s important to cut them off if they become toxic though.

    Posted on November 9, 2016 at 04:40
    1. I agree with you Dannii. Here is a post about how to get rid of toxic relationships http://www.abusybeeslife.com/enablers-accomplices/ we should always reject toxix people from our lives.

      Posted on November 10, 2016 at 03:48
  32. Yes, friendships are great stress busters, especially the ones you can really count on anytime of the day/night. Nice post!

    Posted on November 9, 2016 at 01:11
  33. Hello Sheri,

    Thank you for sharing friendships all about. We must treasure them because they are rare in this world. I have few trustworthy friends all spreading around the globe, and each time we meet, ohh my it’s a great joy!

    Posted on November 9, 2016 at 00:49