How Practicing Forgiveness Can Improve The Quality Of Your Life
Forgiveness can improve the quality of your life.
It is hard but will free you from an overwhelming amount of negative energy.
If you are honest with yourself, you can admit that you have caused pain and hurt to others as well. Knowingly, unknowingly, willfully or not. We have all been hurt betrayed, disappointed.
Just thinking about any of those times brings up old feelings of pain and anger. You might think keeping the memory and feelings alive will prevent the same situation from happening again. It won’t.
Do You Keep The Pain Alive And Wounds Open?
Walking around holding onto resentment, grudges, and animosity will only fuel the drama.
For weeks, months, years, decades, and even a lifetime?
It’s not easy to forgive and forget, to simply let go and move on, but you know what? You should.
It is the only way to free yourself from the grip the pain and hurt has on you.
I realize that many people assume that if you forgive someone; you are saying what they have done to you is okay. Which it isn’t.
You think to yourself why should I let this person get away with their awful behaviour?
The answer? To free yourself from the burden.
When you forgive, you in no way change the past – but you sure do change the future. ~Bernard MeltzerClick To Tweet
Forgiveness Can Improve The Quality Of Your Life When You Learn
Its True Meaning
Releasing the person or people who have hurt you, and no longer going to allow them to have any control over you, your feelings, or your energy. Let it go.
I know. It is easier said than done. Forgiveness must be put into practice in order for it to work. It requires repetition. Forgiveness not only offers you freedom but peace of mind. Why would anyone want to choose bitterness and resentment over forgiveness?
Forgiveness demands courage and integrity. Doing so makes it easy to give up your desire for revenge.
Forgiveness can improve the quality of your life because when the negative feelings are gone, you can replace them with empathy, generosity, compassion, and kindness.
The weak can never forgive. Forgiveness is the attribute of the strong. - Mahatma GandhiClick To Tweet
It is important to learn to grant forgiveness. See it as a way of moving forward.
Allow harmony to enter your life to be at peace with yourself.
It is for your sake and has nothing to do with the person who has offended you.
7 Ways Practicing Forgiveness Can Improve The Quality Of Your Life
1. Forgive Yourself First
You need to first be at peace with yourself before going about forgiving anyone else. There might be things in your past that you feel embarrassed about or ashamed of. Have you hurt someone or even a number of people, which you now regret? Forgive yourself and grow from your past. If you keep reliving your past mistakes, they will be forever present in your future.
It's one of the greatest gifts you can give yourself, to forgive. Forgive everybody. Maya AngelouClick To Tweet
2. Let Go Of Negative Feelings
Negative self-talk as well as harbouring negative feelings towards others will get you nowhere.
It sucks away your joy and productivity. This was a hard one for me to learn. In the past whenever I would think back to someone who hurt me, all the negative feelings would come back up and I felt more hurt, pain and anger.
After forgiveness, when you think of the person, it is not associated with negative feelings, rather a sense of pride that you were able to release the pain. That is growth.
3. Have Empathy
You just never know what is going on in a mind and heart of another person. Even if they tell you, you may never be able to fully grasp it. That is what makes us all unique. Something that might seem petty to me, might cause another person rage.
Ever made a joke about someone and it turned out you were the only one laughing? Did you end up hurting their feelings? A person might be going through one of life’s tough seasons and may react differently than they normally would. They might be going through something you know nothing about, which may affect their sensibilities.
4. Acknowledge Your Role
There are two sides to every story. Or maybe three. Either way, you don’t have to be wrong for someone to be right. Accept the part you played in the situation. As they saying goes, you can’t change what you don’t acknowledge.
You may be completely and 100% innocent. But most likely you aren’t.
5. Learn Something From The Situation
No matter your experience, small or great. There is always a lesson to be learned.
Forgiveness will help you to improve the quality of your life because you are learning and growing. Change is constant, so don’t let disappointments get you down. Challenge yourself to do better, and be better.
6. Time Is Necessary
You will need time to process your hurt and pain.
Depending on the gravity of the situation, you may need a few weeks or even months to get over what has happened. Just remember, the longer you distant yourself from the person you should be forgiving, the harder it will be to work out the problem.
If it is a situation not worth rectifying, or too much damage has been done, then forgive yourself for your part in it, forgive the person who has hurt you and move on. Don’t dwell on it for too long.
Take your time, but make sure you get there. You owe it to yourself.
7. It’s Not Always All About You
Do you know that when you choose not to forgive someone, those other people who have nothing to do with the situation might end up hurt because they are affected by it?
Take this scenario. A group of three friends who spend ALL their time together. They go shopping, to the movies, chat on the phone, etc. Two get into an argument and stop talking to one another. Neither of them has one nice thing to say about the other.
All the great times and moments from a friendship of a lifetime, gone down the drain. Neither one wants to back down and forgiveness is not in the cards.
So what position does this leave the third friend in? A difficult and uncomfortable one. Avoid any unnecessary drama at all costs.
I have heard stories about Thanksgiving dinners gone bad.
Siblings stop speaking, cousins can’t stand the sight of one another, uncles and aunts at war.
That definitely has an effect on other family members. You may forgive and decide to move on, which is fine. Forgiveness does not necessarily mean reconciling with the person who upset you. Remain cordial instead of making everyone else feel awkward.
Forgiveness is a process and a life well-lived is your best revenge.
Forgiveness is a virtue of the brave. - Indira GandhiClick To Tweet
Questions To Think About
- Do you feel that you can’t forgive others until they apologize to you?
- Do you hold grudges towards other people?
- Do you still feel bad about things you’ve done in the past?
- Is there someone in your life now you need to forgive?
- Do you seek forgiveness from anyone?
12 Great Ways Forgiveness Can Improve The Quality Of Your Life
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Going into as much detail as you please, share an experience with me where you have forgiven or were asked for forgiveness.
Do you believe practicing forgiveness can improve the quality of your life?
Share your experiences with me in the comments section below.